Mind Your P's and Q's

I think it goes without saying that manners and the art of being polite are not valued or taught as much to our children anymore.  These are the days of entitlement and spoiled rotten kids (and adults for that matter).  Last Monday, we had a family night on manners;  how to properly introduce yourself (eye contact and a firm handshake), table etiquette, and always remembering to say please and thank you.  Robert poignantly observed that manners are simply a way of thinking about another's feelings-- which I had never thought of in that way before, but I LOVE this new definition.  Being polite is just putting yourself in another person's place and asking how you would want to be treated if the tables were turned.

Here are some pet peeves of mine regarding a lack of manners:

1.  Just because I say "yes" to a calling at church does not mean that it isn't a sacrifice every week or that I always enjoy teaching everybody's "little darlings"--as a matter of fact, I rarely do.  An expression of THANK YOU is always appreciated and really should be expected on a somewhat regular basis.  The amount of time and sacrifice that goes into Robert's calling as scoutmaster, for example, should warrant a hell of a lot more gratitude than it does.  (This is me talking, not him).

2.  It is RUDE and thoughtless to be late on a regular basis.  I know people, who shall remain nameless, who must plan on being late because they have never once been on time!  It is incredibly selfish and arrogant to walk in late to a planned event.

3.  Along the same lines as #1, just because I am a Mom, doesn't mean that running kids to lessons or friends' houses, cleaning the house, helping with homework, doing laundry etc. is enjoyable or should be expected without a thank you or the occasional reciprocation of favors.  I frequently remind my children that I am not their servant and that cleaning up is just as "fun" for me as it is for them.

4.  Children who are spoiled and entitled.  I DO NOT think that having "things" necessarily equates to a spoiled child.  It is the not having to work for what they get that results in an entitled attitude.  This is something I feel very strongly about and so if my kids want something, they must do chores additional to their regular ones to earn whatever it is that they want.

5.  People who talk about money in public.  It is rude to divulge your income, how much this or that costed, the amount in your retirement portfolio, or constantly refer to expensive brands of cars or clothes.  It is also very rude to ASK direct questions to someone else about these things.

6.  Always respect another person's opinion, regardless of if you agree or disagree with it.

7.  Learn how to be a good listener.  This requires a person to stop what it is that they are doing, whether it be a project, laundry, or the internet and make eye contact.  It requires concentrating on what the person is saying and not letting your mind wander.  In our age of technology, this can be particularly hard to teach our children, and to do ourselves, but nonetheless is very important.

8.  If you make a mess, CLEAN IT UP!  My kids got in trouble for this one today.  It boils down to rudeness, to get something out and leave it for someone else to clean up.  I often wonder what would happen if I didn't clean for a whole week.  Kids will not appreciate what you do,  unless they have to do what you do.  If they have to do their own laundry, then when I occasionally do it for them, they are magically THANKFUL.  Hmmm.  Funny how that works!

And that's all for now.  And you're welcome.  And thank you for reading.

Our Christmas 2010

Elisabeth

Me and Miss Madison Christmas Eve

Me and my Mom

Even Christian gets to sit on Santa's lap

Posing with new Christmas pjs

Grandma and her "special" white elephant hat

Stephen sits with Brooklyn on Santa's lap

oh the excitement!!

coming up the stairs Christmas morning

Madison gets a camera to make her movies

Ashton and his glasses straw

You know you have a teenager when they
are excited about getting clothes for
Christmas

Elisabeth with her many animal critters

Our breakfast feast

Mom and baby Charlotte

My sister Kristen with "the sisters"

Robert posing with his cool new sweater

TigerDog and Jazzy

Where did they get that?! NOT from me...

Last night I couldn't sleep, so I did what I always do:  I thought about each one of my children and the things about them that warm my heart.  Last night's mental picture was of the traits that they each had that absolutely didn't come from me.  I get a lot of satisfaction when I see my children exhibiting characteristics that I always wished I had so they can avoid my many weaknesses and pitfalls.  Here is my list:

Christian--has a lot of confidence, with the perfect amount of humility mixed in.  He seems to innately know who he is and doesn't feel swayed by his peers.  He is very respected among them because of this.  He has a lot of charm and a way about him that is happy and laid back although he is also extremely driven.  He loves the Book of Mormon and church history and the desire to read and study comes naturally to him.

Madison--is a social butterfly.  This definitely did not come from me.  She is friends with everyone and is always laughing and having fun.  She is very creative and anyone who spends time with her always has a blast.  Madison is always compassionate towards the underdog.  She has done many kind acts of her own volition for me when I'm having a bad day, and for any of her peers who may be lonely or different somehow.  Even since she was a toddler, she has had a very thankful heart.  She is always the first one to say thank you for anything I do for her.

Hunter--in his teacher's words, "Hunter is the really smart, cool kid in the class."  Hunter is a natural at everything he tries (like his Dad).  Everyone wants to be his friend, all the girls have a crush on him, he excels at school with little effort, and has many many talents.  The best part about this is that he is completely aloof as to how good he is at all his pursuits.  He has always been a peacemaker.  He has a peaceful and sensitive spirit.  Hunter also has the happiest, most beautiful smile I have ever seen, and always wished I had.  When he smiles, you can see his soul.

Elisabeth--because I married an artist, all my children seem to be talented in this area, but Elisabeth is probably the best.  I always wanted to be able to paint or draw beautiful masterpieces and I tried really hard, but alas, they were always very average.  Elisabeth's teacher is amazed with her drawing abilities and says she is by far the best in the class.  Elisabeth is bursting with personality--very passionate about her opinions, and very expressive with her feelings.  She is naturally physically affectionate, which I am not.  I love this about her.

Ashton--perhaps is too young to tell which traits he exhibits are his, and which are a product of his age.  But a couple things that he does that are so endearing to me are that when he chooses (which is rare) to give me hugs and kisses, he starts with my forehead and says "here, first."  Then he points to the tip of my nose and kisses it, followed by my lips, and then "one cheek, and the other cheek."  Oh how I love this!  He also regularly tells me that he has "big, brown bear eyes."  I could get lost in the depths of those huge brown pools that he sees out of.

I am so thankful for my children who inspire me everyday to be better, who I greatly admire, and who I am too proud of to ever put into words.

A Charles Dickens Weekend

Our weekend in Park City was the best of times . . . and the worst of times.

It was the best of times when we were the only ones at the heated outdoor pool and we all played "Corners" and "Marco-Polo" together.  Everyone was happy and it felt like we were the only ones in our own little world.

It was the worst of times when Robert ran into the store to get a few things and left me in the car for 45 minutes while the 2 youngest clawed and pelted each other, screaming at the top of their lungs.  I finally yelled out, "You're driving me INSANE!" as a passerby gave me a judgmental look of disgust.  When Robert emerged from his leisurely shopping trip, he said HE COULDN'T FIND WHAT HE WAS LOOKING FOR, so we had to go to another store.  This time, I gave him a 2 minute time limit.

Here are some pictures I was able to take:

Downtown Park City

Found this house on our Sunday drive

So quaint...

There is so much beauty in simplicity

The kids loved this dog who had made himself a snow throne

I never tire of walking Main St.

A purple house?  Why not?

A teal house with a pink door?  Why not?

A snow blanket

A spectacular day

"Squatters"  -- Our favorite place for breakfast

Playing in a very warm pool

The Canyons

The kids had fun running from the pool to laying in the snow

Little Ashbear loved the hot tub

Little bird tracks

I love shadows on the snow

Just Dance

Madison and Elisabeth had their dance recital tonight.

A rare good picture of me and Christian.  Ready to leave for the Nutcracker.