The other day, I made reference to the fact that I was making gingerbread ornaments with the kids on my Facebook page and my sister Becky mentioned how she was having a hard day and that had made her feel worse. I will NOT be that woman that makes other women feel "less than" because simply, I deplore women like that and to think that I live my ideal every day is a MAJOR misnomer. So to make her feel better about herself and to dispell any false impression that things are always hunky dory over here, I thought nothing would be better than some confessions. Here are some of my plain and ugly day-to-day truths:
*It is not uncommon for me to open my car door and have a rock-solid chicken nugget fall out. Yes, my car is almost always a sty.
*I secretly relish saying an occasional "damn" or "hell" because sometimes, it just feels good.
*We eat on paper plates almost every night.
*I just had my anti-anxiety dosage upped by my doctor. Much better.
*The other day, one of my older kids reported that the two year old had taken off his diaper and spread pooh all over his room (a frequent and genetic tendency in all of my children). Well, I was just not emotionally up to the challenge, so I avoided that room for 2 days until gathering up enough courage to tackle the problem. Out of sight, out of mind, right?
*I go through phases where I am very anti-social and the thought of having to answer the door or talk on the phone is an absolutely painful concept.
*Sometimes, I save up my errands to run for when the kids get home from school, so I have some place to go. I know, really bad.
*I can no longer watch any movie with the least bit of depth or sentimental-ness because my life is so stressful that I find these movies emotionally taxing, which I cannot afford and thus stick to movies with senseless humor or wonderful gratuitous violence. Sorry Mom.
*I am so used to being in the hall before church even starts that on the rare occasion that my children are behaving, I have developed a severe case of ADD in which I cannot sit through a full sacrament and must find some reason to take one of my children out.
*When things get really stressful and the kids are fighting, especially during the summer, I sometimes banish my children outside, or worse--to the tv. "You are to sit in front of that tv until I tell you, you can get up!"
*I daydream about living in my bed sometimes.
*I feel like I need a nap every day.
*More often than not, I finally get ready for the day right before my kids get home for school, and on really hard days, right before Robert gets home from work.
*I occasionally hide from my children when I just can't deal with the messes and fighting anymore.
*The other day Elisabeth said, "I want to be just like you Mama and so I just went to the bathroom with the door open! Just like you!" Great.
Alright, I think I have redeemed myself from the notion that I have it all together. Now you can all feel good about yourselves today when you think about how low functioning and frazzled I am. Enjoy.
7 comments:
I LOVE IT!! I love the honesty, because I could relate to almost all of them. Why do we as women allow ourselves to feel less than others. We all have our strengths, we all have our weaknesses. You'd NEVER catch me decorating gingerbread cookies with my children...but I'd probably deal with the pooh mess immediately....
Great post. So real. Thanks.
Oh my gosh, Sandy! I was literally laughing and hollering with joyful glee the entire 3 (blissful) minutes it took for me to read that. I just LOVE having you as a sister so much because on top of your many strengths, you're also very real...and not afraid to admit it. I LOVE that about me Sha-She. That was seriously some of the best comedy I have seen/read/heard in years. It's so funny when someone is bold enough to reveal the forbidden truths of motherhood because I think most women secretly can relate to a good majority of your bold revelations. Oh my gosh...my cheeks hurt because I STILL have a smile on my face. I just love being a "Brinkman" girl..and especially being related to other "Brinkman" girls!!! I think you just seriously made my whole year. hahahahahahaha! Sandy Dandy's my hero!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHHAHAHA LAUGHING MY BUTT OFF!!! I can't stop!!! My favorites on your list were definitely the movie thing because I am the same way, but I always have been that way, it was never something that came over time.....and the other favorite was the church thing. I think I will be the mother who pinches their child so I can get up and take them out hahaha
I have NEVER read such an inspiring blog post in my entire life. Thank you. And bless you.
If more mothers were open about what it is really like to be a mother, women would feel more supported in their efforts to be good mothers. In being open you disspelled many myths that exist. You have done all mothers a great boost by acknowledging that, yes, we all have weaknesses. As usual, you have put everything back into perspective. We CAN have a bad day, and you know what? It's normal and okay. Your next door neighbor probably is too, but she's too busy protecting her image as the dutiful mother to ever admit anything was amiss. Thank you.
Sandy - that was awesome...YOU are awesome!
After reading Tiffany's blog I needed to check out your confession's blog!! Love it! I remember as a young mom reading the Ensign. Every article seemed to be written by a mother of 15 kids and president of every organization in their town as well as 10 or 12 church callings. It seems a no brainer why they stopped that tidbit in the Ensign. Always made me feel a failure. Thanks to both you and Tiffany for giving us all a needed laugh and reminder that ups and downs are all part of life.
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