I just HAD to laugh

I have always had a somewhat inappropriate sense of humor which I blame fully on my mother. When I say "inappropriate" I mean that I feel the uncontrollable urge to laugh when it is the absolute very worst time to do so. Let me give a few examples: I can remember two girls getting up to sing in sacrament meeting. When they opened their mouths to sing, it was hideous--like two foghorns simultaneously going off. The fact that their faces were soooo very sincere about what they must of thought was beautiful drove me, on the front row, into hysterics. I tried so hard not to laugh that I was crying and had to excuse myself in the middle of their song. There have been other times when people have tripped, or done something clumsy, or even worse when someone has an unfortunate disability that I have hated myself for doing it, but laughed. I know, I know. I'm evil. Does anyone besides me remember the little movies they used to show us in primary or young women's about the person with no limbs, who can miraculously knit with their teeth, or the burn victim whose message to the youth was not to worry about zits, because it could be worse--you could be maimed like me. It's not that deep down inside I don't have an enormous amount of respect for these survivors, it's just that I know I'm not supposed to laugh at that moment and thus my tourette's syndrome rears it's ugly head. Part of me was always very disturbed by these supposedly inspiring movies, thinking that at some point, I too would be limbless or paralyzed from the eyeballs down. Another one pops into my head of a family with a little boy who is run over on the way to school by a drunk driver, and the family feels so bad for the man who killed their son, they take him a cake in prison for his birthday. WHAT?!! I was literally sick to my stomach after watching that in primary. Anyway, the point of this is that Hunter, my 8 year old, came home from school with a short paper he had written, AFTER THEY SHOWED THE CLASS A MOVIE ABOUT A GIRL WHO LOST HER ARMS. This is what my little Hunter had to say:

"Bonnie Consuelo, a very descusting person who has no arms but very tallinted with her feet. She can do everything that we can do, even cook with her feet!" When I inquired as to why he was disgusted by this inspiring person, he giggled, "Because its gross and a little funny too." I composed myself enough to explain the lesson he was supposed to be learning from watching this; determination, resiliance, courage and then locked myself in my room and had a very little, but inappropriate laugh. Please don't judge me, I know there's something wrong with me . . .