I Love My Fam-Damily

I recently posted pictures of our Mexican Riviera cruise on my blog here (Party of 7).  And while it was definitely an adventure and had lots of fun moments providing many memories that I am sure we will look back on fondly, it was still a FAMILY TRIP--which I think we all know is not relaxing and rarely enjoyable for the parents.  Here are some "fond" highlights of our trip:

*Elisabeth from some unknown reason started FREAKING out about having sand on her body while at the beach.  Heaven only knows why the previous 2 hours of frolicking in the sand did not bother her, but after her screaming and writhing in pain as if being tortured for about 30 minutes, Robert decided the best thing to do was to try to wash the sand off her in the ocean.  Very logical conclusion, right?  Picture this:   Robert carrying Elisabeth out to the ocean, all while kicking and screaming "No Daddy!  You're going to DROWN me!  NOOOOOO!"  He then proceeds to dunk her repeatedly in the ocean while she flails and screams at the top of her lungs that she is being killed.  I have to admit, it seriously DID look like he was trying to drown her in the ocean.  As I silently took in the horrified stares of the onlookers around me, I decided the best thing for me to do was to move my towel away from my family so as to not look like the wife of the man drowning his poor daughter.

*A child, who shall remain nameless, became severely constipated while on the cruise.  So our days were filled with hourly updates as to the "status" of his situation and having to force fruit and water down him all day.  You can imagine the consequences of the subsequent BLOWOUT from long days filled with fiber, in a room that was literally 6 feet long by 6 feet wide.  I have fond memories of dry heaving out in the hall after entering his room.  Good times.

*Near the end of our sojourn, I was so incredibly weary of entertaining kids, temper tantrums, fights, power struggles, etc. that I told the middle three kids to please entertain themselves anywhere but where I was on the ship.  Of course I gave them the usual short lecture about not talking to strangers and always sticking together before they left.  Then I enjoyed 1 hour of only the youngest having meltdowns, and it felt like pure heaven.  When the kids came back, I asked them what they had been doing and they said "doorbell ditching" the other passengers. In my temporary insanity, I uttered a silent prayer that they wouldn't get caught and sent them back out on their merry adventure.

*My beloved sound machine which I am severely addicted to and absolutely cannot sleep without BROKE before the first night.  I could not, for the life of me, sleep for the next 7 nights. When I would occasionally start drifting off, I would hear my fellow shipmates drunkenly coming home at 3 am from a fun-filled night of karaoke, jerking me out of my deliriousness.

*Being greeted in the morning, after yet another sleepless night, over the intercom with an overly cheerful ship attendant saying, "Come play Bingo, folks!  It's FINGO lickin' GOOD!"  Really?!  That's supposed to be witty and funny?  And do people really pay thousands of dollars to go on a cruise to play BINGO?!  Apparently they do.

*The nasty stares of people around us at dinner as the youngest refused to sit up to the table to eat, preferring instead to be in the fetal position under the table.  Honestly, we were just happy that he had stopped climbing on us and being hyper.  I was about to go tell the lady off who was being so incredibly judgmental of us with her dirty looks and whispers to her companion, but as is common in our relationship, Robert talked me out of a physical confrontation.  I still wish I had had a nice little chat with her. . .

*In an attempt to get some enjoyment out of the next night's dinner, we took Ashton to his little play group to be tended while the rest of us went to dinner.  When we came back, the lady said he had just barely fallen asleep.  So after a 10 minute cat nap, he tossed and turned next to me, trying to carry on full conversations until 1:30am.

*After being asked what their favorite parts of the trip were, (never a wise thing to ask), Hunter piped up, "The arcade!"  What?!  The ARCADE?!  After threatening him that he had darn well come up with a better favorite thing he answered sullenly, "OK fine--I guess the zip lining was a close second."

*Daydreaming of better, easier days back at home doing laundry, errands, and cleaning while most of the kids were at school.  Enough of this Mexican cruise!  Get me back to my laundry and dishes!!

*Reminiscing about how good the sea otter that I am watching has it, with a slight tinge of jealousy.

*Waking up Monday morning to the aftermath of our trip:

So I did what any good mother would do; got the kids off to school, put a movie on for the youngest, turned on my new sound machine and went back to bed.